This is a literary retelling of a real scene from Vanderpump Rules. It can be found at approximately the 6 minute mark.
approx 550 words
"Oh puppies!" a woman exclaims as I am carried down the aisle, a yellow corsage attached to my collar. The sun reaches through the high trees and everyone smiles. My humans stand together under a white ribbon, a blanket of white petals stretching beneath them across the forest floor.
I am handed off to the Best Friend and the ceremony begins. He smells like suntan lotion and aftershave. His lapels are shiny and slick, his bowtie sharp. Behind us, a red-faced man with veins laid thick across his forehead, grins. His teeth are angular like a shark, his eyes beady like a lizard. I sniff the air around him and scrunch up my nose - I don't like this smell - and quickly turn away to nuzzle my face into the crook of the Best Friend's arm.
But it is too hot! I soon lift my head for air and wag my tongue. The scent of other dogs close by catches on the breeze and my heart starts to race. There are so many of them! I tilt my head, sniffing, searching, reaching my little nose as far as the Best Friend will allow. And then, I find them. They are tucked into almost-human outfits and perching on the laps of spectators. They are draped with purple feather boas. They snooze under rustic, white-washed chairs. My tail dances with curiosity and I scramble and kick in the Best Friend's arms but he just clutches me tighter.
One of my humans makes a joke and people look at each other and laugh, exhaling champagne air from steaming mouths. The Best Friend laughs too and my body shakes against his chest. I look up and see that his eyes are red, his chin is starting to quiver. Shuffling from foot to foot, he turns to look at a blond woman who is also in a suit. She stands in the row of men with us instead of in the row of women and the Best Friend smiles at her. She winks at him. His heart pounds and his desire for her is obvious, even to a fluffy little dog like me.
My humans speak strings of words and wipe their faces. Their hands shake as they read pages pulled from back pockets and from between the stems of a bouquet. The wind blows and I lift my nose to what lies ahead. Carrot cake, buttercream frosting, roasted chicken, creamy salmon drizzled with lemon, buttery mashed potatoes. I lick my lips and the Best Friend absentmindedly scratches behind my ears. I yawn and seep into his arms. My eyelids flutter.
The next time I look up, everyone is crying. Words crack and are quickly swallowed. Their cadence is fastfastfast then very slow. Long pauses and thoughtful glances. My humans gaze into each other's eyes and reach for each other's hands. There are clusters of "aww"‘s. A chorus of sniffles. A smattering of claps.
The Best Friend cannot take it any more. This feeling is too overwhelming! He lifts me to his face, and wipes away his tears with my fur.